| 100 najbizarnejših citatov |
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| 18. 11. 2009 | |||
Glasbeniki bi se pogosto morali držati glasbe in ne trositi svoje modrosti vsakemu, ki jim želi prisluhniti. Kombinacija slave, napihnjenih egov, drog in norosti lahko sproducira res čudaške (in pogosto nadvse smešne) izjave.
Objavljamo 100 najsmešnejših izjav glasbenikov, ki so jih zbrali pri britanskem magazinu The Clash. Največ so jih zbrali The Beatles in brata Gallagher iz Oasis, na lestvici pa so tudi Bono, Johnny Rotten, Mick Jagger, Madonna in Eminem. Zaluženo se na vrhu lestvice nahaja Serge Pizzorno iz angleške skupine Kasabian. Zaradi avtentičnosti prevodov nismo objavljali.
98. "Until I was nine years old I thought 'cunt' was a term of endearment."
97. "Everybody does drugs... When you go on the road, there's nothing to do but do drugs and fuck."
96. "I don't listen to music. I hate music."
Johnny Lydon, bolj znan kot Johnny Rotten.
95. "I hate to see chicks perform. Hate it... Because they whore themselves. Especially the ones that don't wear anything. They fuckin' whore themselves."
94. "To some I'm a junkie madman who should be dead, and to others, I'm a mythical genius."
93. "The way I compliment a girl now is by saying, ‘I want to throw knives at your vagina'."
92. "I feel bad for people who don't drink, When they wake up... that's the best they're going to feel all day."
91. "England isn't good on lubricants."
90. "I don't pay any attention to the business side of music. I paid a whole lot of attention to the sex, drugs and rock ‘n' roll though."
89. "I'm on a diet. It's very strict: all hot dogs. Just sausages, constantly. It's working out - I've gained fifteen pounds!"
Beth Ditto (The Gossip).
88. "People would say to me, "Hey man, you look just like Paul McCartney", and I'd say: "I wish I had his money!""
87. "The idea of having to conform to someone else's ideal is unacceptable. I'm gonna be me. And if I can't be me, then I'd rather not do it."
86. "I enjoy looking like a tart and thinking like a politician."
85. "I could go on stage, unzip my pants, and hang my dick out and people would think it was some statement or something."
84. "As long as you remain black, you're still gonna be a nigga."
83. "The only thing that could possibly save British politics would be Margaret Thatcher's assassin."
82. "We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out."
81. "I'm a bisexual man who's never had a homosexual experience."
80. "I'm not homosexual, I'm not heterosexual, I'm just sexual."
79. "It's no longer sex, drugs and rock ‘n' roll. It's crack, masturbation, and Madonna."
78. "Ultimately, I want to make everyone horny."
Patti Smith rada razvnema svoje občinstvo.
77. "I like them old and rich."
76. "I just don't think we've ever wrote shit tunes. Even when we were amateurish, we knew we were writing better songs than other bands."
75."When I dance, it's incredible. I can't describe it, there's no words. You just tap into your mojo and you just go."
74. "All this role model bullshit; you don't have any extra responsibilities because you made some good songs! Your only responsibility is to make good songs."
73. "If you want a warning about doing drugs just look at Pete Doherty and Amy Winehouse - it couldn't be any plainer. I mean, let's face it, they're doing nothing for your intellect, your wit or your complexion…or your hairstyle for that matter."
72. "The hippie aesthetic and the way of life has always made me want to puke, but at the same time I'm a complete hippie; I'm just a vegetarian, peace and love, love vibe, hippie meditator - and I hate hippies! I don't know what I'm gonna do. I may as well just shoot myself in the head!"
71."Sometimes we pee on each other before we go on stage."
70. "I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to."
69. "I'm the one that's got to die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to."
68. "Elvis died the day he went into the army."
John Lennon: ljubitelj rock 'n' roll in nasprotnik vojaških uniform.
67. "The American public really does have a death wish for me. They want me to die. I'm not going to die."
66. "When I die, bury me on my stomach and let the world kiss my ass."
65. "I'm thought of as this pissy, complaining, freaked-out schizophrenic who wants to kill himself all the time."
64. "I've always enjoyed myself. Unhappy periods for me last about twenty minutes."
63. "When I first went to the Betty Ford Center I was very surprised they didn't have a bar there... I thought they taught you how to drink like a gentleman."
Ozzy Osbourne: simpatično zmeden.
62. "A rock ‘n' roll star should have a drug habit at least once in their career, they should have a Rolls Royce, should smash the fucker up, should have a big house, should get off his head and THAT is a rock ‘n' roll legacy."
61. "I think I'll got to Thailand for a year and become a Thai boxer. I'm gonna train for a year."
60. "I thought I'd give being a frontman a shot. I didn't know what the fuck I was doing - I still don't."
59. "The Beatles were just a band that made it very, very big, that's all."
58. "Madonna is closer to organised prostitution than anything else."
57. "I've never had a problem with drugs. I've had problems with the police."
56. "If I didn't have some kind of education, then I wouldn't be able to count my money."
55. "I was thinking what the differences were when we last played here twenty-eight years ago. Well, there's the smoking ban, but fuck that. We're still bombing the shit out a country we shouldn't be and the Prime Minister is still a cunt."
54. "How could you even dream or think something of someone who is as uncommercial as I am?"
53. "How the fuck am I still here?"
52. "If Amy Winehouse thinks she's invincible, she's so far wrong it's not even funny. She shits, she bleeds, she shaves, just like everybody else on the planet."
51. "There's no guy that would wanna kill us. There are girls that get so obsessed they would want to kill us. They wanna shoot us, they wanna do whatever."
50. "There isn't a town in the world I haven't run amok in."
49. "I'm an instant star; just add water and stir."
48. "The Who is just a brand name now - two old fuckers with wrinkles and tricks."
47. "I break my back for music because it's something that I love, but I'm not going to break my back for a bank. I wouldn't want to be an ATM repairman; there are some things that just aren't worth it."
46. "As I get older my eyesight's going bad, I don't know what I'm in for [with groupies] until they come backstage and they're very large with missing teeth."
45. "I already feel that I am making a political statement by sticking around in music, when I am doing it so differently to everyone else."
44. "I do sometimes think I could have done without the drugs actually; that was a waste of time, and a huge risk. But then again, there's nothing I can change, so in a way regret is pointless."
43. "When I get stirred it incites something inside of me. I want to bash my head on the wall… I don't know what else to do. If I could rip my fucking chest open on that stage I would."
42. "I've learnt that there's nothing in my day to day life or anything that I do that is in any way aimed at changing how I'm perceived or how I'm presented; it's completely impossible."
41. "I use too much of my brain and need to let some of it rest."
40. "If I saw me I'd want to speak to me, too - I'd think, ‘That guy looks like he's from Mars, he's somehow strangely compelling.' I don't even look human."
39. "It gets better and better being me."
38. "Maybe they think I'm a big-mouthed cunt from Manchester, and they'd be correct. I don't give a fuck what people think about me. I'm not arsed."
37. "I suppose I do get sad, but not for too long. I just look in the mirror and go, ‘What a good-looking fuck you are.'"
36. "Chris Martin looks like a geography teacher. What's all that with writing messages about Free Trade [on his hand]? If he wants to write things down I'll give him a pen and a pad of paper. Bunch of students."
Kako dolgočasno bi bilo življenje brez modrosti bratov Gallagher.
35. "You've seen one of our gigs, you've seen 'em all."
34. "Drugs is like getting up and having a cup of tea in the morning."
33. "[Liam is] like a man with a fork in a world of soup."
32. "If there were gold medals for taking drugs for England I would have won a shit load"
31. "You're not fuckin' telling me that somebody that's into The fuckin' Wombats is feeling the same thing as I was when I was into the Pistols? I'm not fuckin' having that."
30. "We're inherently lazy working class Mancunians, you know what I mean? We wanna be getting pissed half the time, and the other fuckin' time we wanna be getting fuckin' high."
29. "I do all the work so it's only right that I should get the most money. Plus I am the most handsome."
28. "I hate that Alex [James] and Damon [Albarn]. I hope they catch AIDS and die."
27. "Rock and roll doesn't allow you to grow up - especially if you're not trying very hard to."
26. "I like to think of us as Clearasil on the face of the nation. Jim Morrison would have said that if he was smart, but he's dead."
25. "Never talk about a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes. That way when you talk about him you're a mile away and you have his shoes."
24. "There wouldn't be no grime without me."
23. "I won't be happy until I'm as famous as God."
22. "Somebody said to me, ‘But The Beatles were antimaterialistic'. That's a huge myth. John and I literally used to sit down and say, ‘Now, let's write a swimming pool.'
21. "Of course we're doing it for the money. We've always done it for the money."
Mick Jagger je včasih študiral ekonomijo. Res.
20. "I gave up rock ‘n' roll for the rock of ages! I used to be a glaring homosexual until God changed me!"
19. "Yes, if there is such a thing as [genius], I am one."
18. "I've got a fierce passion for politics but I can't stand the smarmy, hypocritical upper-middle-class dictator nation that prevails and has always prevailed in this country. I'm up for petrol bombers, mate, and fighting in the streets."
17. "Sometimes when I'm flying over the Alps I think, ‘That's like all the cocaine I sniffed.'"
16. "Don't do drugs, don't have unprotected sex, don't be violent... leave that to me."
15. "Well, put it this way, compared to the Razorlight album [Bob] Dylan is making the chips. I'm drinking champagne."
14. "I think if it doesn't do what I say, if it doesn't do what I want, if it isn't politically subversive, if it isn't sexy, if it isn't stylish to make all that happen then it isn't truthfully worth listening to."
13. "I'd love to think that I've maybe influenced people to consider a vegetarian lifestyle, but in my heart of hearts I fear that more than that I've encouraged them to get wasted and fucked up."
12. "Good music should always come from the groin. Never the brain. Good music is about fucking."
11. "Drugs goofed my mind up."
10. "To be in Kings Of Leon you need at least two STDs, a drinking problem, and a love of animals."
9. "I'm really happy I'm me because if I wasn't I'd be scared. If you want that Number One spot you need to listen to my album and try to beat it."
8. "It's actually come as quite a shock to learn just how many people don't like me."
7. 'm warning you with peace and love I have too much to do. So no more fan mail. Thank you, thank you. And no objects to be signed, nothing. Peace and love, peace and love."
6. "I want to be like Gandhi and Martin Luther King and John Lennon - but I want to stay alive."
Madonna: neuničjiva!
5. "What about whales? They are ignoring animals that are more important. Animals need saving and that's more important. This New York thing is being blown out of proportion. Who gives a fuck about New York when elephants are being killed."
4. "We're more popular than Jesus now; I don't know which will go first - rock ‘n' roll or Christianity."
3. "When you think about it, Adolf Hitler was the first pop star."
2. "Vote for Enoch Powell... I think Enoch's right, I think we should send them all back. Stop Britain from becoming a black colony. Get the foreigners out. Get the wogs out. Get the coons out. Keep Britain white."
Sergio Pizzorno: skromen kot vedno in nenamerno duhovit.
1. "Dance music was on its arse before we came along." |
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Keith Flint: mislite, da si njegov zdravnik boji, ko mu gleda grlo?
